What's inside a woman's handbag?

By Tim Brown

Like Jason and his Argonauts approaching the infamous Cyanean Rocks on their search for the Golden Fleece, there are some areas of life that are filled with a combination of mystery, terror and foreboding. Nowadays we may not have to face the terror of re-animated skeletal soldiers like Jason and his friends but there do remain some things which retain a primeval fear and mystery. Chief amongst these is, of course, the contents of a woman's handbag.

Seriously off-limits to even those married for dozens of years, the woman's handbag is misted in inscrutable anonymity and obscurity. Just what does she keep in there? Men folk over the years have had very little to go on, but some clues have gradually presented themselves. For example, on rare occasions a coat is borrowed by a wife or girlfriend, perhaps an old fleece jacket to be worn while doing a spot of gardening. It is then eventually returned with pockets full of tissues and perhaps a spare inhaler. Does this give us a clue to what might be in her bag?

Maybe it does and maybe it doesn't, could it really be that simple? I like to think not, as all men know women are a mysterious and strange breed and, much like the mystery of why women visit public conveniences in pairs, perhaps it's better it stays a mystery. I would suggest that just like Pandora's Box it's just best to never to open it and find out.

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Tim is an occasional contributor of whimsical articles to stripykat. For more articles check out the article index.